And
voila, it has been three weeks.
Since I've been back, it seems as if I haven't had a moment to breath. Whether it is going to Disneyland with the family, hanging out with old friends, or going to dinner with the boyfriend, my life has been on fast-forward, nonstop mode since I've landed. I can't complain because each thing I do has been wonderful and so entertaining. However, now more than ever, I'm realizing how important
le temps pour moi ("me" time or time for me) is.
Most of the time I find myself asking: "It has already been three weeks...shouldn't I already be adjusted?!" but I have to remind myself that no, Elysabeth, it hasn't
already been three weeks...it has
only been three weeks. The days I feel "weird" or in some kind of "funk," I just attribute it to the fact that it's raining or perhaps because school is starting. But in reality, I have this never-ending buzz of anxiety that lingers in the back of my mind. It becomes most apparent when I'm alone. If I'm not doing anything, I suddenly become anxious and must plan to do something. But then, if I'm too busy, I have this sudden urge to just stop and run away. If I actually take a moment to think about it, it isn't difficult to see that this is all part of the adjustment period that everyone must go through upon their return.
As much as I love English-speaking classes, reuniting with friends, family and Mark, and beautiful California weather (well, with the exception of this week), some days I'd rather be in the 1000x slower-paced environment of France. There are times when I'd trade a day of sunny California for a 4-hour conversation over coffee at a cafe in cobble-stoned Lyon. Sometimes, I am willing to sacrifice the English-speaking classes for just one more walk across the Rhone and Saone rivers. And always, I will miss the open air markets on Sundays.
Each day is different. Most of the time, my perspective and attitude is entirely in my control so I try not to allow myself to dwell on the past and get sad about not being in France anymore. But sometimes, when I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed or stressed, the urge to be in one of the most beautiful cities in the world gets the best of me. Fortunately, I've had enormous support from loved ones all around. They continue to bring me sunshine and they remind me everyday of why I love being home.
[I've definitely missed the family]

[And this lovable person I call my bf]

[Old-timers]

[My world traveling buddy who I have yet to travel with]

[And my girls...]


In addition to adjusting, one [major] worry keeps nagging at me and that is...
money. I am currently working at the Orange County Register but if I get the 2nd job that I'm hoping for, that dreaded worry will be erased...making my life less stressed and much lighter. Only time will tell...in the meantime, I'll keep my fingers crossed and continue living life without a worry (or pretend to do so!).
I think a mini reunion with some of my girls out in France is necessary...that is why I'm going to make the drive of death to LA on Thursday night after class. I'm hopefully going to get dinner with Jessica and Emily. It will be interesting to hear how their adjustments have been. I have a feeling we'll all find some comfort in each other's experiences :)
Here are just a few snippets of what I miss--
[How time magically froze]

[The fresh markets that were vibrant with energy and vivid colors]

[My home where my heart was...]

[My awesome key & chair]

[CHEEEEEEEEESE!]

[These ladies and others <3]>

[And of course...this.]

Change is a part of life. Change is something that is inevitable. It's not easy. It's not bad. In fact, most of the time, change makes you stronger, more mature, thoughtful, cultured, etc. I can't wait to see what these changes entail for my life.
I love this life I've been blessed with.
This is what I must remember.